 his incident made a very funny story. Everyone laughed when Jill told it a few nights later, at a dinner with Alex the magazine editor, his friend the television producer, and an assortment of writers eager for a free dinner and an assignment. Most of the people at the table knew each other only tangentially; they had been assembled through an acquaintance of the producer's, on the grounds that they were the most interesting people in San Francisco.
"So at that point I was, like, this guy is kooky, so I just said goodbye and went to leave. And so he follows me out and holds the door for me and says, 'Sorry I had to kick you out. But the rules are the rules.' Referring, I suppose, to the automatic surveillance system."
"He really does sound peculiar," said Alex.
Alex and the television producer had come from New York on business. Most of the writers present were also 'sex workers,' although one of them, an earnest bald woman, handed out cards advertising a therapy by which to recover from sex abuse. The television producer, a melancholy person with whom Jill once had a minor telephone flirtation, confided in her that Alex had arranged this dinner in order to meet Cindy, a determined and impish woman who published a stylish sex magazine. She had apparently written an article about anal sex which had gotten under his skin and provoked a correspondence. She seemed very nice, but Jill wondered why Alex couldn't find anyone to have anal sex with in New York.
"Why do you like this guy?" Cindy asked. "Is he sexy in any way?"
"Not in the normal ways." Jill imagined the dentist standing before these people, and the bewildered looks on their faces. "Except I could feel...I'm convinced he's a secret pervert and that he just doesn't know it yet."
Cindy smiled appreciatively. "You think if you could just get him into a sling, he'd be fine?"
"No, I don't think he'd ever actually get into a sling, whether he wanted to or not. I think he'd just keep getting into slinglike positions in inappropriate situations." Jill had of course just described herself, but Cindy didn't know that, so she laughed. Jill wondered how Cindy would've reacted if she'd said, "Because I thought he was kind."
Several of the guests began to discuss the politics of the various strip clubs around town, one of them denouncing "those corporate strippers" who were really just middle-class girls who thought it was cool to be a sex worker. Someone else expressed disdain for those who said sex workers had all suffered child abuse and did such work as a result. Another got irritated over the negative portrayals of sex workers in the media. The woman to Jill's left was muttering darkly about her desire to infect the water supply with chemicals that would sterilize the population.
Longingly, Jill thought of the dentist at home with his entertainment center. As if reading her mind, Alex said she should've invited the dentist to the dinner this evening. "He wouldn't have come, of course. He would've driven up and down the street looking in the windows over and over again, wondering whether or not he should come in. It would've driven him crazy."
"I don't want to drive him crazy," said Jill. "He's shy, Alex."
"Nonsense. Of course you want to drive him crazy. And in the long run you will. Because you touched his fear. Every time he sees anything you've written, he'll think of you and twist a bit."
"You think?"
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