At a certain point, I became fully engaged with my feelings of rage,
rebellion, hatred, and revenge, which displayed themselves, in true
waiter custom, through passive-aggressive exchanges and behavior. A
man in his early 70's approached me as I was walking around with
a fresh tray of roasted pig. He asked what I had and, as I eyed him
in his White Hunter Black Heart safari outfit, all I could think of
was, The food on my dish is exactly what you are! And then
the word came falling out of my mouth. "PIG!" I was screaming into
his face. He repeated his question and I ejected the same virulent,
venomous response: "PIG!"
As I wandered through the party, serving, I slowly adopted a persona.
The amazing thing was, it was my ancestors who were guiding me. I
became the black in colonial Africa; especially when I came across
this one woman who had gone to the extreme for this little soiree.
She was around 70 years old, and she had put either shoe polish
or burnt cork on her face and body. She wore a grass skirt, sandals,
a tank top, Afro-wig and two coconuts to resemble tits. I was so
shocked by her outfit, it became almost funny. What fascinated me was
that no one seemed at all concerned that we waiters were there
observing them. This woman was totally oblivious to how degrading to us her
costume was.
Or so I thought. Sometime during the evening I saw her sitting in a
corner nursing a martini, looking desperately uncomfortable. Maybe
she was starting to feel the alienation of her new skin color--you
don't want to stay black for too long unless you are willing to bear
the responsibility. It's like a wine taster trying to go 10 rounds
with Mike Tyson. Of course, the real reason was probably that Miss
Long Island Mint Julep, our hostess, hadn't told our Miss Jungle Bunny
of 1922 that we dusky brooders of Manhattan would be there. She was
mortified; she had been outed.